Eli Zoid Gauger

Ducreux

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 01:50:24 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

FOR SALE: Keen Cyberpunk Maryjanes sz 7.5 – $40

Tue, 17 Nov 2009 05:22:55 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

FOR SALE: Keen Cyberpunk Maryjanes sz 7.5 – $40, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

These are Keen brand, hard-wearing, mary jane-style shoes. Rough and tumble urban design with a badass sole and beautiful black brushed suede upper. They are darker in life than in the photo. I love the little yellow alert symbol the most; it looks like Keen doesn’t even put it on their shoes anymore. These fit your feet in a cushioned embrace and would be perfect for walking, working, or parkour in gritty, futuristic style. They are a 7.5 US Women’s, despite being labelled as a size 8.

These are in excellent condition and are practically new. They retailed for $90!

These are partly leather. Sorry, vegans!

To buy these shoes, PayPal me at eliza DOT gauger AT gmail.com

You should look at the rest of the detail shots here.

Lorraine test sketch for tomorrow’s Dancing Bear Benefit

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 07:14:27 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Lorraine test sketch for tomorrow’s Dancing Bear Benefit, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

The nose is all wrong, but this graceful creature is nonetheless my
friend Lorraine, who has just suffered a grievous accident in which
she fractured her spine. She is a dancer and a model and is now
bedridden, totally unable to support herself. Tomorrow I will be
running a tipjar marathon in which I paint portraits of her all day,
and collect donations on PayPal for her medical bills. Anyone in
their right mind would love a picture of this Frazetta-noir beauty.
The paintings, as well as two $50 gift certificates to Clockwork
Couture, will be awarded to the highest tippers as the day goes on.
BE THERE. SEE THE MAGIC.

Sweatshop: www.ustream.tv/channel/sweatshop
Whitechapel Sweatshop announcement thread: freakangels.com/whitechapel/comments.php?DiscussionID=688…
E. Gauger’s blog: elizagauger.com/gibberings/

Donna Ricci Paintup Detail

Sat, 24 Oct 2009 10:05:25 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Donna Ricci Paintup Detail, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

Donna Ricci’s $45 Paintup Portrait Progress

Sat, 24 Oct 2009 10:05:07 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Donna Ricci’s $45 Paintup Portrait Progress, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

Tomorrow we’ll be adding color.

A Gentleman of Innsmouth (detail)

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 23:01:06 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

A Gentleman of Innsmouth (detail), originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

A Gentleman of Innsmouth

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 23:00:52 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

A Gentleman of Innsmouth, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

A Gentleman of Innsmouth
9×12"
acrylic and chalk pastel on wood

I completed this in Berlin and it has been imprisoned in the truck of
my car since then. Still warm from the streets, this is being offered
to the Dibs List and will make its way public if it is not bough by
them.

Outgoing Minicommissions!

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 06:44:22 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Outgoing Minicommissions!, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

These eccentric little packages are winging their ways to loving
owners at this very moment. Thanks to SWEATSHOP patrons for the good
times!

Gorgon progress. Still painting at http://ustre.am/3Qjc

Mon, 19 Oct 2009 07:40:25 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Gorgon progress. Still painting at http://ustre.am/3Qjc, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

ustre.am/3Qjc

The fruits of the Dancing Bear Marathon. Congratulations Kaylynn, Phil and Jas!

Sun, 18 Oct 2009 04:40:19 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

The fruits of the Dancing Bear Marathon. Congratulations Kaylynn, Phil and Jas!, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

Dancing Bear #Sweatshop results, round 1 [http://ustre.am/3Qjc]

Sun, 18 Oct 2009 01:49:01 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Dancing Bear #Sweatshop results, round 1 [http://ustre.am/3Qjc], originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

STARTING NOW: Dancing Bear Pledge Drive Paintathon

Sat, 17 Oct 2009 22:18:54 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

STARTING NOW: Dancing Bear Pledge Drive Paintathon, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

HOW IT WORKS:
I’m gonna sit and paint on Ustream, as per usual. But this time, I’ll
have my guitar case open next to me! As long as the audience keeps
tossing in coins, I’ll keep dancing at the end of my chain.

DER MONEYS:
For every $3 that lands in my PayPal account (eliza.gauger AT
gmail.com), I’ll stay online for another 5 minutes. At the end of the
day, or when money stops coming in (whichever comes first), I’ll tally
up the donations. The top patron will receive the painting itself;
second and third place will get an illustrated card (like these) a
piece.

WHY I’M DOING THIS:
I’m waiting to find out if I’m moving to LA or not. Meantime, I’m
jobless in Oakland. Consider this one more phase in the Grand
Experiment of surviving on art.

You get half an hour free. We’re starting right now!

GO TO THIS URL TO JOIN THE AUDIENCE: http://ustre.am/3Qjc

JOIN THE CHAT ROOM ON IRC:
We hacked the Ustream chat backend on IRC. Join server chat04.ustream.tv, channel #Sweatshop during a Sweatshop and private message Smushy, who will set you +v.

A Mascot for Clockwork Couture

Sat, 17 Oct 2009 08:46:55 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

A Mascot for Clockwork Couture, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

Donna contacted me on Twitter during one of my SWEATSHOPS and
commissioned a little drawing for Clockwork Couture, her steampunk
specialty fashion store. Even sent me some samples, including this
very coat. I hear this will go on stickers, possibly flyers, and
generally around the shop. I plan to try some clean-looking color.

#SWEATSHOP: Gentleman Squid is complete. Tune in tomorrow and hurl money at my suffering!

Sat, 17 Oct 2009 06:30:41 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

#SWEATSHOP: Gentleman Squid is complete. Tune in tomorrow and hurl money at my suffering!, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

Limited Print Run of “Flee” Available Now

Mon, 05 Oct 2009 23:56:14 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Flee (No Longer Safe in the Long Grass)
oil on board
12 x 12″

Flee sold tonight, leaving in the steely clutches of a patron. I’ve taken it down from Etsy, shed a motor oil tear, and started the print run. I was sad to see it go.

This print run is extremely limited: only 25 will be made. Once these prints are gone, there will be no others. Each print is 13 x 13″, with the print area being 12 x 12″–a one-inch margin to allow for framing. They are professionally printed using Giclée process on beautiful cotton rag. They are archival, rich, and subtle, with a matte finish that perfectly imitates the surface of the original painting. Each print is numbered and signed by the artist.

Prints will be shipped unframed, rolled carefully in a sturdy mailing tube. A very tiny run of framed prints will occur at a slightly later date. Price includes shipping.

A Very Commercial Sweatshop: Tony & Jhayne

Sat, 03 Oct 2009 07:29:32 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

A Very Commercial Sweatshop: Tony & Jhayne, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

Commissioned portraits of two of my favorite people.

A Very Commercial Sweatshop starts now!

Thu, 01 Oct 2009 23:46:01 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Join me in the Sweatshop, a live drawing broadcast wherein I point my cam at my paper and go nuts.

This episode is brought to you by Rent, the concept (not the musical), and will be run entirely on the fuel of instant commissions. Here’s how it works:

Step 1: Decide what you want me to draw. It can’t be more complex than can fit on a 4 x 6″ card, because that’s what you’re getting.

Step 2: Decide if you want it penciled ($5), inked ($10), or colored ($15).

Step 3: PayPal me the appropriate amount of money at eliza.gauger SMOOP gmail.com, along with your request.

Step 4: Watch closely as I draw everything your wittle heart desires!

Sweatshop [Ustream]

To the Highest Bidder: “What He Left Behind”

Thu, 24 Sep 2009 11:20:10 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Bees!

More good news for collectors of original scribbles! I am selling my Sketch-a-Day from a few days ago. I don’t sell sketches much, as they have two qualities that make them priceless to me:

1. They’re by far my most expressive work, and
2. Nobody wants them.

This sketch was the subject of a Sweatshop during its creation—a live-video feed, with audience, that I do sometimes to let people see and interact with my work process. It’s about 9 x 12″, graphite on thick cream paper, and would be cut right out of my current sketchbook.

Please feast your nubs on the piece here: http://twitpic.com/hxbuf
Remember to click “View Full Size” to see the detail.

I will start the bidding at $40. Email me to make your offers at eliza *DOT* gauger *AT* gmail. I will keep track, and respond to bidders on Friday to let them know the current price. If it does not sell by the end of the week, I will put it on Etsy.

Good luck!

WHATTUP

Mon, 14 Sep 2009 00:33:15 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

WHATTUP, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

The WHATTUP series begins here, with a monster from a sketchbook many years old. I really shouldn’t be working on this, nor on my comic script WORSE, which has been cooking for years and I just started really -writing- two nights ago. No, droogs, I should be working on the next Priority Mail series exclusively. I’m still immensely ill, and my Berlin solo show has been pushed back to November. Which is excellent. Breathing room, you see. And in October, I’ll be pulling up stakes in favor of Los Angeles, a town so awful I can’t help but be excited, in the same way one looks forward with dread to the tonsillectomy that will finally end the chronic strep infections. Will there be nurses? Ice cream? Soft words?

The Cake is a Squid

Sun, 30 Aug 2009 22:31:20 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

The Cake is a Squid, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

The Cake is a Squid

Sun, 30 Aug 2009 22:31:08 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

The Cake is a Squid, originally uploaded by vebelfetzer.

Famine

Sat, 29 Aug 2009 05:09:03 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

Since I’ve arrived in Seattle, fleeing a hostile Oakland and its pathetic, pinching parking tickets and tow lots, I’ve been eating off the trees.

Seattle is so goddamn clean. On walks, I see little flashes of dusty plums, and compound-eyed blackberries, and bright orange berries with five-pointed leaves, and I pop them all into my mouth. The blackberries are blown-on, to dust away spiders and thorns. Plums are polished on pant legs, from matte to glossy to gluttony. Bright orange plums too, although those are split and oozing this week, a little too far gone. I remember the placement of pear trees (Woodlawn and 46th), I pull the car over to find the one unwormed apple on an early tree.

I had forgotten all of this. Now I ask people, have you seen a hazelnut tree? School is starting. They drop off the branches and if you stomp them with fifth-grade sneakers, the shells will fragment harmlessly off the pure white nut, and you can eat them like bonbons. Better than roasted. Better than honeyed, salted, or mixed.

The city people say “no thanks”. The ones grown up in filthy, smoggy, inedible parts of the country. Where it is wise to distrust the urban forage. Where someone taught you that outside was dirty. Where someone hid razorblades in the apples. Where everything is gravel, and Sunday morning vomit on the curb. You poor, hungry bastards. Where food is only found indoors, where you have to be able to read something to eat it, that’s where you grew up. You can hardly call that a childhood; it was just a Time Without Huckleberries.

The Obese Have Smaller Brains

Thu, 27 Aug 2009 21:34:45 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

2:30:00 PM Me: As time goes on, I find myself less and less able to draw anything without berating myself for the cliches I see.
2:30:03 PM Me: It’s become agonizing.
2:30:25 PM Me: I need new material, or less material, I don’t know which.
2:30:37 PM JWZ: or, see them not as cliches but as wry references
2:30:51 PM Me: Those don’t make me scowl any less.
2:31:03 PM JWZ: well, you are scowl-oriented.
2:31:16 PM Me: I wouldn’t have to be that way if less stuff sucked.
2:31:19 PM Me: Think about it.

Veryveryveryvery Gooooood.

Sat, 22 Aug 2009 08:30:28 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

1:18:48 AM Me: HEY GUYS I WROTE A SONG
1:18:54 AM Me: OH REALLY LET’S MAKE A VIDEO
1:19:01 AM Me: YEAH COOL WHAT SHOULD THE VIDEO BE ABOUT
1:19:04 AM Ian: VERY GOOD
1:19:04 AM Me: BEING MEXICAN
1:19:06 AM Ian: THAT’S WHAT
1:19:11 AM Ian: CAN WE SHOW MY RED TRUCK
1:19:12 AM Ian: YES.
1:19:16 AM Ian: LETS ALL SNORT LINES
1:19:17 AM Me: HOW ABOUT THIS DONKEY
1:19:26 AM Ian: CAN MY FAMILY BE IN IT TOO
1:19:29 AM Me: WHERE’S JOSE HE PLAYS THE TUBA RIGHT
1:19:35 AM Me: YEAH MAN BRING EVERYONE
1:19:39 AM Ian: CAN PEDRO BE IN IT HE WANTS TO ZOOM HIS FACE INTO THE CAMERA AND BACK OUT
1:19:39 AM Me: WE’LL BBQ
1:19:47 AM Me: THAT SHIT IS TIGHT
1:19:49 AM Ian: AND LETS BRING THE CATTLE HANDS TOO
1:19:58 AM Me: YEAH AND SOME MULES TO RIDE
1:20:04 AM Me: EVERYONE WEAR FLANNEL
1:20:04 AM Ian: OOH, I HAVE 3 SUITS AND WILL CHANGE BETWEEN THEM

Sunday

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 11:23:25 GMT

Originally published at Gibberings. You can comment here or there.

An opportunity at the Woodland Park Zoo: a white man slouching on the sloth bear fence growls and guffaws over the ditch. The bear is pacing laps through burrows dug into the fiberglass by thoughtful environmental engineers, looping back out, around through his “habitat” over and over. Claws the size of garden trowels. Big shaggy face.

Whiteboy’s face is clean, and so is his polo shirt. Starch white and striped green, sort of offensively prep, maybe even a popped collar. A bland girlfriend.

“That fucking guy,” I say to my family. We’ve been sneering at the stupid as much as we’ve been smiling at the sublime. Sunday at the zoo.

“Hey man,” I say to Whiteboy, as my family moves back a little, gives me space to work, “Don’t antagonize this poor animal. He’s savage and irritable. You’re just stressing him out.”

He stops growling at the bear, and looks at me. His face is greasy and sheepish. He asks me if I work here.
“Yes. Not today; just here with the family. Now knock it off.”

He says okay. He says he’s sorry. I nod, magnanimous. I tell him it’s okay this time, anyone could make that mistake, just don’t do it again. He hurries away towards the parrots, girlfriend silent in tow.